Every new day is another chance to change your life.

"Its hard to accept, but you can't change the past. You can't go back and manipulate things to the way you wanted them to happen. But knowing that things were meant to happen to bring you to the place you are now, that's the beautiful thing about life. Life is like a rope, twined in all its complexities and yet weaved into a stream that give you the chance to use something amazing from it."

Its hard to move on from your past, let go of certain things.. but the hardest thing, in my opinion, which you would think would actually be the easiest.. is learning from your past, and not bringing the negative things with you to the future.

Its been a struggle for me, things that have happened to me over the past couple of years- its hard not to bring that with me into my life now. I dont regret anything, and I am grateful for what I went through, it made me stronger, better, wiser and eventually a lot closer to God. Which, isn't that what were ultimately here for? However, Ive found myself struggling a lot lately, trying to let go of certain things, change certain things.. but how do you? How do you go through experiences that bring you to your breaking point and not let it affect your future relationships? They've affected mine. As much as I try to push thoughts away, feelings away, I can't.

I walk in constant fear that its going to somehow replay itself, wondering if I could handle it again.. I know I have to stop thinking this way, because it is ruining the things I have now, but how do you stop..

"Someone comes into your life and half of you says danger, pull away, you are nowhere near ready.. and the other half says, make them yours forever.."

This quote resides with me everyday.. as stupid as it may be. Its completely true. I want to pull away from anything that could remotely hurt me the way that I've been hurt before.. my reactions to certain things show that. And unless someone knows what I've been through.. they wouldn't understand.

..but.. The truth is, no one is ever going to fully be ready after facing certain obstacles that change them. Face each day as a new day.. learn, adapt, and know what you want.. then fight like hell to get it. And even when you think your ready.. the truth is your probably not, your going to fail at what you want, who you set out to be.. learn some more.. realize even more, then do it all over again.

The complexity of life.

- Im re-starting this blogging process. To hopefully revamp my life. There is a lot I've learned in a short period of time, and the way current things had to work out in order to bring me to this way of thinking is pretty crazy. Ask me how I know Jesus is around.. because He always brings me back to this point, where I make extensive realizations.. and things had to happen just right for me to see them. -

"Every New Day is Another Chance to Change Your Life...."